Problem Faced by Attractive Individuals #49:

People steal your school ID card so they have something with your picture on it.

Facebook Messaging! Yay!

 Edna: hi rosetta. heard u got new job
Rosetta: Yeah, I'm a lifeguard at Green Lake Pool now.
Edna: sweet. You'd guard lives the best. I knows it.
Rosetta: Aw, thank you, my adoring little sycophant. :-) Now why don't you tell me something I don't know? 
Edna:...
Um...the weathers great here in Honolulu...
Rosetta: Oh, and speaking of guarding lives, there's something I need to tell you. You know how you hired me to water your petunias and feed your tadpoles while you're gone on vacation?
Edna: yes
Rosetta: Well, how many tadpoles do you have?
Edna: 20
Rosetta: Well, 2 now. 
Edna: What?
Rosetta: I forgot to feed them. lol
Edna: You didn't. 
Rosetta: Your petunias are fine, though. :-)
Edna: !
Rosetta: There I was, feeling so grown up and responsible (which I am, of course), taking care of the petunias, and after a couple days I realized with sudden horror that I was forgetting a VERY crucial detail...THE TADPOLES!
They need food, it turns out...
Edna: Are you joshing me, Ro? 
Rosetta: They're all floating right now. I assumed that means they're dead. I mean, when I life guard at the pool, when people just start floating I just assume they're already dead. Saves me the trouble of, you know, hopping in and rescuing them and getting my hair wet and all that. 
Edna: Those were my kids tadpoles!
Rosetta: Yeah, I wish the whole thing wouldn't have happened. But, hey, you've still got 2.  Survival of the fittest, right?