Just another post in which it is your duty and privilege to read, as it is written by yours truly, the future dictator

I've decided to have at least six kids when I grow up. It's ambitious I know, but I've been thinking a lot lately about it. You see, I've had to put up with my peers for all my life, and a considerable amount of them are brats. It's probably because they don't have enough siblings to humble them.

(I'm not saying that I'm so perfect and humble because of my 6 younger sibs, I'd process those values even if I were an only child with millionaire parents, of course.)

I figure that it's the kind, decent thing to do to have 6+ kids. I have so many awestrucking qualities, it wouldn't be fair to pass those genes down to just a few fortunate souls. The world is obviously better with me in it, just think of how unfathomably spectacular the world would be with 6 beautiful, perfect children of mine!

Pet Peeves

Everybody has got a pet peeve. I've been trying to discover mine. It's hard to find the one, as you probably understand. There are so many things in life that annoy us! How do you choose one to be your pet peeve?

I was thinking about it, and here are some of my pet peeve options:

Dogs. I hate the way the bark, smell, and obnoxiousness habits. Worse, my blood runs with hatred whenever I see a preview for a Disney's Airbud or Airbuddies. Santa Buddies, Space Buddies, Snow Buddies, Treasure Buddies, Spooky Buddies, thinking of them all make me sick!

Pop music, hip hop, and rap. I am very cultural, artistic person. However, I am cultured in higher arts, not in low art forms that barely pass as music. Pop is practically a bunch of girls singing and they sound like they're in pain.

Any cartoon that is not Avatar: the last Airbender or Phineas and Ferb. Down with Sponge Bob!

People who think that I'm joking about DOMINATING THE WORLD!!!! They're mocking my dreams!

The list goes on.

I've come to realize that these aren't pet peeves, they're deep and passionate loathings.

A post in which a title is not deemed necessary

EDITOR'S NOTE: This post by no means reflects the author's opinion about babysitting and raising children, except for the views expressed about the cast of The Phantom of the Opera.

I babysat some kids recently, and for some reason their parents are mad at me for letting them watch The Phantom of the Opera. 


At first I understood why, because most often the result of children watching that movie is that they start getting this crazy idea that Gerald Butler is better than Michael Crawford, and what kind of loving parent wants that? I realize that some of you reading this aren't as cultured as I am, so I'll explain who those guys are. Michael Crawford played the Phantom in the original Broadway cast (I would say that he is the REAL phantom, but my mom's been worried that I'm unable to distinguish characters and the actors who play them. Don't ask me where she got that idea. It started after that whole Twilight post). And Gerald Butler played the part in the movie. Michael Crawford is a much better singer. Mom would also say that's an opinion, but it isn't an opinion, it's a fact! As future dictator of the world, I draw the line between facts and opinions.

But the parents weren't even mildly concerned about their children's taste in singers! Their reasoning for their children not watching it is that it's rated PG-13. Ha. Ratings Shratings. That movie has hardly any inappropriate parts! You know, except for the swearing. And the dark thematic elements. And the blood. And the sword fights. And the scary part with the gypsies. And the part where Raoul almost drowned. And the part where Raoul was almost strangled. And all of those guys who actually were strangled.  And the skimpy costumes.  The very skimpy costumes. Christine practically hung out in her 1800s French underwear for half the time. Granted, underwear covered up a lot in those days, but she still should have covered up more. "Hello, Phantom. Would you mind if I changed into something a bit less showy before we sing our 'Phantom of the Opera' song? Thanks."

But besides all of that stuff, it's a family friendly, fun, cute movie. Although for some reason, those adjectives aren't often used to describe it....